{pause}
Is there anybody out there?
Hmmph.
It occurs to me that Tazarina may sound a little intimidating. It's regal. It's powerful. It's an insignificant syllable longer than tzarina – a Russian empress. Yes, that could be me.
But since in reality I couldn't be farther from some sumptuous palace brimming with dazzling Faberge eggs, myself dripping in exotic gems, swathed in faux furs and feasting on vegetable borscht served up on dishes of solid gold, you can call me Tazzie. Everyone else does.
Mostly.
To mother, however, I'm Mami, Mamita, Mamacita, Muñeca, Muñequita, Cuteness, Poopy Bear, Honey Bunny, on and on, including, I kid you not, Pooquiia and Pooquiitita Dinda.
Presently, I'm plotting my escape. (Don't believe it; she loves her nicknames – Ed.)
Yeah. Whatever. (Is this a happy face?)
So that gives me a thought: write me about your humiliating human. Let's see how they like it!
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